My Soul Has Wallpaper

25 07 2007

No, I’m not kidding. Hang with me here, it will make sense by the end.

Today I got to work at Lucy at the crack of dawn. My manager (who I really like) goes “So Kimberlee quit.” Now, what you have to understand is that since we got our new store manager about 8 people have quit. Quite without notice, mind you. Basically, I knew right then that I was in for a long morning.

When I’m right, I’m right.

It was hard work. We had lots to unpack and sort and hang. We ran out of pant-hangers (akin to apocolypse when you work retail) and the whole morning was scattered through with stories of stress and annoyance.

I got off work, bought TWO pretzels and headed to my internship at Village Theatre.

Oh.

My.

Gosh.

The costume shop was full of people today. Good people, mostly, but young and heathen. The did not stop gossiping, being sarcastic and tearing-down people, not even once. Most of the time I can handle it. I either ignore it or I call them on it. Today it was just too much for me.

It got to be about three o’clock and I’m talking to one of them. In the course of the conversation he just happened to mention that he’d been raped by a priest as a young man. I think my mouth actually hit the floor. Two thoughts rushed to the surface: am I having this conversation? and why, Lord, why?

Needless to say, at this point I was not doing well. I said “Fred. I’m going home”, packed up my stuff and left.

Later, describing the day to Stacie I could only think of one way to put it, “Imagine that my soul is a room, with really pretty silver and cream wallpaper. It felt like there were creatures in there, shredding the wallpaper with their claws. I just couldn’t take it.”

So I did what I do in all such situations. I took a nap. When I woke up I was in a MUCH better mood. It felt like the Lord came in while I was sleeping and replaced the shredded paper with new, gold and cream stripy stuff. I felt sunny and light and the whole day faded out.

And from now on I shall picture my soul as having wallpaper. If you want to know how I’m doing, ask me to describe the paper. It should give you a good indication of how I am.

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2 responses

25 07 2007
Jennifer James

I wish you had told me you’d had such a day when you called! I would have told teressa we would pin the dress later adn you and I could have talked! I love you! I love your soul-paper!

25 07 2007
walkingintherain

No worries. By the time I called you I was much better. If I’d really needed you I would have said so.

Much love!

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